Speed Bumps

In the previous post, I mentioned something about how my horoscope predicted hitting a "speed bump." This prediction definitely materialized a few hours ago. Today at 4pm, my boss informed me she had to let me go. Today was officially my last day. The news sent me hurdling through space. Apparently, they have to lay off some people and since I was the most recent hire, I got the boot. I noticed one guy hadn't been in the office all week. I thought he was out of town, but turns out he got the boot earlier in the week. Huh. It's okay because I seriously was thinking about finding another job. I wasn't happy there. The only good things were I could wear jeans to work and I could disappear for over an hour and no one would even notice. Maybe now I can find a job that won't make me want to slit my wrists, but I'm so damn sick of looking for work every 3 months. I want to progress, not move laterally. I want to find something I love. I want a job where I can actually explain what my company does. I want a job that takes taxes out of my paycheck so I don't owe thousands of dollars in taxes every year. Serendipitously, I discovered last night that a friend of mine works for a staffing agency. She's gonna hook me up. She's already on the case. Hopefully my unemployment will reverse itself soon. I guess it could be worse. I could be homeless and unemployed. At least I found housing. Sadly, I'm used to getting let go and being unemployed. Maybe I'm becoming desensitized to it. Good grief. How many jobs will I end up having in my life, anyway?

I remember several years ago when I was living in L.A, I got let go from a job. I immediately called up my friend and an hour later, literally had a new job to start on Monday. Until this day, that record stands as my shortest unemployment period. My longest was the spring/summer of 2002 when I didn't work for 6 months. Thanks to unemployment, I was able to get by. Summer is a good time to be jobless. Maybe I'll work on a tan.

Of my roommates, I'm the only one who is up in the morning. They have different schedules than me. I was jealous of this, but now I can sleep in, too. I can stay out late and not feel so tired in the morning dragging myself to work. Sigh. It just sucks they gave me no notice. This is the second time this year I've been let go from a job without much notice. At least at DePaul they told me the night before. I knew it'd be winding down. I believe everything happens for a reason, thus I believe something better will develop. Always does. And now a certain opportunity that once seemed forbidden could potentially open itself up. It all could fall into place if I play my cards right. There's not much I can do right now, so I'm going to take the weekend off and hit the pavement on Monday. I'm also gonna pitch writing ideas and drum up my freelancing. Apply for some production jobs, too. I want my life completely figured out now, not 5 years from now. When will I get my big break? I feel like such a failure. Can't keep a job, a residence, or a boyfriend. Chicago, why do you keep kicking me around? What are you trying to do to me? Toughen me up? Lead me into a better direction? In times like these, I just have to be positive. I desire more stability. I mean, I hate it when things are complacent, and I hate being stuck in a dead end job, but I need something to last. I want the good things to last, not end. Fuck everything. I'm moving to France.