It's Always Something

So, today I woke up to find out my neighbor smashed in the left side bumper of my car with his car. He says he'll pay for it, but he's delusional when he thinks it's only gonna cost $100. It'll probably cost more than that in labor alone. So now I have to take it to a body shop and get an estimate. Just another thing stressing me out and to worry about. I mean, wasn't trying to find a place to live and figuring out what I'm going to do post Time Out enough? Okay, time to take a deep breath.

I did check out a really rad apartment today. My friend lives there and his family owns the building. It's really kinda out of way--it's not within walking distance of anything and if I lived there, I'd have to drive everywhere, but it's huge and vintage and really nice. There's hardly any furniture in there, too. The rent would be affordable and my friend spends part of the year in AZ, so hopefully when he's gone, I could live there alone for the rest of the year (that is, if he decides not to rent his room out). The only thing is my friend apparently likes to walk around naked. Um...yeah....But if dealing with that for one month with the possibility to live alone, I'd consider it. My friend is also a masseuse. Score. I'd love to stay in Wicker Park so I need to keep my options open. Then again, a new neighborhood might be a good thing. I've already lived in three different ones here. I just want a nice place to live.

Over the weekend, I went to a party and then saw a movie Saturday night. The party Friday night made me angry. This guy who had stolen my friend's phone at a previous party was there. I kept flicking beer in his face. He shouldn't have been allowed to be there. Nobody messes with my friends. I saw the movie The Fall last night which was weird but kinda good and then watched the horror film Night of Creeps again. I think it's become one of my fave horror films. They just don't make horror films like they used to. Today the weather has been crappy. I really want to go swimming. There is a public pool nearby which I want to check out. And of course the beach. I need to start focusing on my tan more.

Tomorrow is the start of My Open Bar's Saucony sports league. We're playing whiffle ball. I can't remember the last time I played. Maybe middle school? I'm excited about the free shoes and open bar afterwards, but I'm no athlete. I hope we will all our games. Then Tues. night it's Liz Phair. I wish I could quit feeling so stressed about everything. There's a lot of changes on the horizon with work and home I can't even begin to wrap my head around it. I just hope everything falls into place somehow. I got a letter saying I'm getting $300 for my Stimulus. I'm not sure why it's not $600. I really hope they send me a check instead of using that towards my back taxes. Then again, I should probably use that money to pay off the state taxes I owe. I just wanna get the hell out of debt instead of sinking further. Man, I could use a vacation.

Sometimes I feel really vulnerable about things. Like I get excited about something, then I just wait for the disappointment to set in. Then I think, maybe this time I won't be disappointed, but when you invest in something, there's always that risk. I think it's good to take things on a day-to-day or weekly basis. I'm afraid of things not working out, but I'm also content with the way some things have/are progressing. I like it when things have a natural, unspoken way of progressing. But I'm beginning to have expectations. Small ones that will probably turn into bigger ones. Don't hold my breath, I tell myself. Just enjoy the ride.