A Miasmic of Things

It is my lunch hour so i've decided to blog in the comfort of the computer lab upstairs. It's probably inappropriate to write this in the office, especially since every frickin' minute someone walks by where I am stationed. This perturbs me to no end. Everyone must think I'm a slacker. Well, actually I am. I get so bored I check my email and myspace like 100 times a day. Then I get pissed when people don't write me back. I mean, doesn't anyone else have nothing to do all day then to email/myspace? I surely don't.

I'm feeling kinda anxious today. Well, I always feel anxious. I have a million things to do all the time. I have an article due tomorrow and I'm trying to compile a list of the best songs of the year. This is becoming an arduous task. As of right now, I have a list of 100 that I need to narrow down. It's like killing a child. I suppose it's a good sign there were so many good tunes this year. On top of that, I was supposed to compile a list of blogs for a band i'm doing some PR for. They are asking for this list. Right now there isn't much of one. I need to do it, but there are like 800 blogs to peruse. Ugh. And now I've been assigned another story for the Homer Glen newspaper. I had to travel out there a couple of weeks ago to interview a band of 14 yrs old. Now I'm going to try and interview an artist. I like doing these stories except driving out to the South suburbs is a major bitch, especially during rush hour.

Writing is a full time/24-7 job for me. Even on the weekends. I can't go out and enjoy myself a lot of times because I keep thinking about all the things I need to do: clips to send out, blogs to research, etc. And then i become unmotivated and sleep and fuck around on the internet instead. And sometimes I get distracted at home. Don't get me wrong-i love my roommates, but there are times I wish I could live alone or live like Thoreau in a cabin in the woods, but i'd probably get lonely. I wish I could just veg and watch movies, but then I feel unproductive. Last night I went to the Battle of the Bands to watch Little Red and the Hoods kick some serious ass. I was looking around the bar and thinking how everyone else is having so much more fun than me. I hate feeling like this. Everyone else can let go of their worries and drink and dance and feel free. I was just a spectator not really feeling it. I left before the evening was over, something I feel bad about. I should've at least stayed to see who won, but I was tired and had some work to do. I couldn't even completely enjoy myself in NY because the entire trip I was stressed about money. It's uncool to go on vacation with hardly any money in your account. Especially an frivilous place like NY.