Almost There

Tomorrow I'm going home for Christmas for a few days. Finally, Christmas break is here. Time Out's office are closed until Jan. 2nd, so for once in a long time I actually have some time off around the holidays (although I still have to write art reviews this and next week). I'm looking forward to going home and doing nothing for a few days, ie, watching movies and hanging out with friends and family. My friends only come home around Christmas, so i'll be nice to see people I haven't seen in a while. I really could use a break right now. I've been so stressed out and busy with all sorts of things. This week I went to two shows in one night, had an open bar thing last night with free booze and bands, and tonight is the opening night of my friends sketch show months in the making. I just gotta get through the night, get up in the morning, and drive.

I wish I was doing something exotic for the holidays. One of my friend's is in the Virgin Islands right now. I have another friend going to France for New Year's. Jealous. Must be nice to be able to do those sorts of things. I can't stop thinking about going overseas. It's seriously become an obsession of mine. I'm told if I can get to London, flying anywhere around Europe is pretty affordable. Gotta make it happen in the new year. I sorta feel like I'm without direction right now. I keep thinking I want to move into a new place within the next few months....I really need to get hired on at Time Out but can't even talk to anyone about it until Jan. I'm going to start doing some marketing/event work for them which pays a little, so that's something. I keep thinking how all the good guys are taken and how I'm destined to be boyfriendless for eternity. It's not like I really want a boyfriend, but I'd like to have the option. It's just been one obstacle after another. Somehow drinking makes everything better. I know it's not cool to drink to temporarily resolve your problems, but seriously, if I'm feeling stressed, I drank, and then the anxiety goes away for a while. I never drink alone, mind you, so drinking also enhances social situations. Usually. There's a reason why everyone I know drinks so much. They are on to something.

I really just want the holidays to be over with, already. I'm still deciding on New Year's. I think they'll be some good parties and I'm even trying to convince my roommate to throw a party. I want this New Year's to be fun and cool and affordable, unlike the two previous ones. I don't expect any sort of magic, but I want it to be somewhat crazy, in a good way.

I've also been thinking about getting rid of my car, at least for the winter. Having to scrape a foot of snow off it the other day made me realize I don't exactly need a car here. I mean, if it's snowing, I can't drive anyway and it becomes a hassle. Then again, it's a nice luxury to have a car but also a burden. I guess I'm thinking about making a lot of changes in the new year. I just can't keep going the way I've been, aimlessly, trying to get somewhere. Things just have to come together in the new year. Of course I say this every year, but for real. I do think things have changed a lot for me this year and overall I'm pleased with everything that's happened, but everything could always be better. Just gotta get the career on track first and then maybe everything will fall into place. Hopefully.