The Deep Freeze

It's so frigid here in Chicago right now. Like blistering cold. Every winter I wonder to myself why I moved away from CA. I think a lot of people wonder why they tolerate the cold here. It builds character, I suppose.

As of yesterday, I'm officially the music intern at Time Out. I'm going to be writing a few weekly listings. I'm very excited but it's going to be a lot of work. I'm starting my temp job on Monday, so it's going to be a lot of balancing both. I'm probably going to work then come into Time Out afterwards, so I may be working as many as 12 hours a day. That's my compromise. I have to do both. I need to "go off and sell my soul" as I tell people to make money, but then I gotta keep knocking downs door creatively. We'll see what happens. I'm glad I'm coming out of my financial issues. It'll be nice to have some money for a while. I still need to be frugal, though. I feel like I have so much stuff to do, mainly writing. I wish I wasn't so crazed all the time but then again I think in order for me to properly function, I need to be crazed. Just as long as I get it done.

While I feel everything is very positive in my career house right now, I feel it's the opposite in my relationship house. I'm going to be writing some "relationship" orientated articles for New City's sex issue. One article I'm writing is on how I think men and women can't be friends. This is what I call the When Harry Meet Sally syndrome. I simply have a difficult time being just friends with the guys I regularly hang out with. Even if you set those boundaries, they always get crossed. I think my biggest problem is most of these so called friendships were based upon a non-friendship foundation. Then, it's a lot of trying to work backwards and really be friends, but like in the movie, "the sex part always gets in the way." And having to see certain guys all the time because we frequent the same places and have the same social circle, things get complicated. I really think it's good to discuss these thoughts and feelings with my "so called friends." I think it clears the air. I want to know how these people really feel about it. It's always good to know. Lately, it's been a lot of guys who are really into me but me not into them scenarios. And the ones I do sorta like, see above. I think another problem is I just don't feel like being involved with anyone right now. I think I need to uncomplicate my life a little and just focus on other things. I'm just not in the mood to deal with these situations, yet it seems I'm always dealing with them. I admit I like the drama. There is only one guy who'd I consider exclusively dating, but I'm waiting for him to break up with his girlfriend. And believe me, it's going to happen soon. But then I wonder would we get together? I don't think I'd want to rush into anything with this person. But it's all there in my opinion. I guess I have to see what happens. As usual.

Last night I stayed out much later than I should've. The neighbors upstairs threw a party which was sorta fun. I'm going to concerts tonight and tomorrow night and then two next weekend. I'm off to two art galleries now. I have to review two art shows. I don't know what I'm doing before the concert. I don't really want to go but I'm locked in. I'm supposed to go to my friend's girls night slumber party thing, but I'm not into doing makeovers and girly stuff like that. And it's cold. Maybe I'll just snuggle under the covers.

Well, I didn't stay in. I went to the show and it kinda sucked, although I did run into a friend I hadn't seen in a while. I also met a mutual friend from Nashville. Lately, I've been obsessed with going down to TN. I want to visit my friend in Lexington and then go down there. It's been 20 years or so since I've been to TN. And now that I know someone I can stay with, I'm totally going to go. The question is when..