Workingman's Blues

Lately, I've been really frustrated with everything. I have only a couple of weeks to find a place to live and have no idea where and with whom. I hate looking for apartments. I just wish I could find a sublet for a while where I didn't have to put down a deposit or sign a lease. And if I have to have a roommate, I want to only live with one person and preferably with someone I know. Once I find a more stable place, I'll feel a lot better, but right now I'm on the verge of panic mode. Again.

I'm also really frustrated with my job. I know I shouldn't discuss it on here, but my job bores me to tears. I really need a salaried position with benefits and a job that challenges me and forces me to be creative. I saw the Onion is hiring, but the chances of me even being considered for the position is slim. I'll apply anyway. I also would like a job that entailed travelling a little. I'm jealous of people who get to travel for their jobs. I know it's probably not that fun, but you get to go places on the company's budget. Either that or I'll just follow the boyfriend on business trips. But that's not going to happen. More than anything, I just want to travel, but alas, I'm always stuck here. It's really quite unfair. So many people and places to see, but time and money won't allow it. I was supposed to go to Witch Lake this weekend but that's out for now. Next weekend I'm supposed to go to OH so hopefully that'll pan out.

It has sucked with the boyfriend being away. I don't like it one bit but I've been trying to suppress my melancholy and neediness. There's definitely a difference between being needy and needing someone. I think it's good to miss people and tell them that you feel that way just as long as you're not crazy about it (which I used to be). I think I'm doing a lot better than I've done in the past. I don't freak out as much and I'm able to do my own thing, but I still don't like it, especially not being able to talk to him much. And of course I worry about the plane crashing, etc. I constantly worry we're going to bust up or that he's going to realize how crazy I really am and leave me, but I guess I can't worry about this stuff all the time. Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer broke up and they've been together as long as we have. If they can't make it work, who can? Um, yeah. So, basically I've been a bundle of worry and frustration lately. I have to interview Jenny Lewis tomorrow and must prepare for the interview. Then I have to do a quick turnaround on the article.

I watched the movie Stepbrothers online last night and actually liked it. It was funnier than I thought it was going to be. John C. Reilly cracks me up. Tonight I'm suppose to see my friend's band play, but I'm probably not going now simply because of logistics. In order for me to get to the venue, I'd have to go across town to get my car, drive to the venue, then either put my car back at my friend's place and crash there for the night, or park near my place then move it somewhere in the morning. Or just take the train which would then entail taking a bus and then going home alone at like midnight. So, it just makes sense not to go. I'll catch their next gig.

I wish it was tomorrow night already. Or better yet, Friday night. This week blows.