Rock 'n' Roll

Last night my friend and I went to an open bar. It entailed promotion of jewelry or something. It was held in a huge warehouse full of free wine and beer. The most pretentious people in Chicago were there. I'm talking douchebags and sorority type chicks, skinny models with old rich guys, women dressed in fancy cocktail dresses–you name it. And then there was me, anti-establishment, dressed in jeans and sneakers. My friend and I had fun making snap judgments at these people wondering if any of them had a clue about anything. We saw a couple walk in. The guy had a funny walk, his hair spiked. We immediately dubbed him a total chad. The girl had a short denim skirt on. I was secretly judging her, too. Then a moment later I realized I knew her. Oops! My friend and I then hung out with douche and tight skirt girl and they weren't so bad. No one was dancing. It was like Footloose. Everyone was too rigid and refined to cut a rug. So tight skirt girl and I danced a little. Together. It was fun. Then, I had to jet off to see one of my fave bands, Junior Boys, in concert. I had to meet up with another friend there. The concert was great, especially the part where my friend and I made a spectacle of ourselves doing something we probably shouldn't be doing in public.

My social life is seriously out of control right now. I think my life would make a good movie. I should look into that. I only have a couple of good partying years left in me before I become pathetic. The age of 30 continues to loom in front of me. The weekend starts for me on Wednesdays now. But despite the late nights, I get up everyday and go to my stupid job. I mean, it's not hard doing data entry all day. It doesn't require much thought. A zombie or monkey could do this job. Well, at least some of it. This week has been more tedious than usual. I really need to find a job that'll support my rock 'n' roll lifestyle. Ideally, I'd love to work from home or make enough freelancing so I could get up at noon everyday instead of sitting in an office. Ah, the American Dream. Tonight I'm going to another open bar and party. Tomorrow off to another show. Sunday I'm going to try to get into yet another show. Sometimes I feel my life is a little too much; it's a huge balancing act, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I don't want to be one of those people who comes home from work and sits in front of the tv all night. I need to live and experience people and things! I'm a writer, afterall. The challenge is trying to appease everyone and fit everything in and still do well with meeting deadlines and working a job. My guy situation seems a bit crazy right now, too. I don't have trouble meeting guys, that's for sure, but keeping them is another thing. Ex Boyfriend discovered my blog the other day. My worst nightmare come true. He's saddened about what he's read, but I think it'll help both of us finally move on. It's been almost a year since we split up. I think last week was good because maybe it gave me a sense of closure with him. It made me realize I will always care and love him, but we aren't compatible like that anymore. It released me. I think I need to keep playing the field to get all of my "oats" out of my system. Time and time again, the universe impresses upon me not to settle down yet. I'm sure at some point a relationship will evolve and manifest, but not quite yet. I need to continue to build a foundation with a certain someone first. I do feel lucky I'm surrounded by good company, especially cute guys. I'm lucky I get to go to concerts for free and occasionally get to indulge in free booze. I think all of these things are keeping me sane right now, keeping me from throwing in the towel on life. My life wouldn't be my life without my daily dose of drama and chaos.

I do have some serious decision making to do. I need to figure out what the hell I'm going to do with my life. Am I going to stay in Chicago or move to NY? What guy should I put my energy into? How can I make a living as a writer? When will I got to France? I'm sure it'll all fall into place and happen on it's own time, but I at least have to try to move things along. I have to figure out a way to make these things happen for myself. I'm going to take the first step in finally going overseas by getting a passport soon. I need to save some money so I can venture abroad.

I'm sure I'll have some interesting experiences over the weekend. In fact, I know I will. And here's a really good song by the Swedish band The Mary Onettes featured on last night's "Grey's Anatomy."